Increasing adoptee wellbeing by providing spaces to connect in person and online.

““It was life changing to be with people who totally understand how I as an adoptee see the world and how my head works!””
— Event attendee

How To Be Adopted was the first UK resource for adoptees by adoptees. We began in 2017.

To find out more:

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Meet the How To Be Adopted team

Claire Moruzzi, founder of How To Be Adopted

Hi I’m Claire. I am a UK domestic adoptee in reunion-ish. I started this adoptee blog anonymously in 2017 after finding no resources for adopted people online or in real life.

My aim is to connect adoptees from the UK and around the world to share our stories and tips on coping as an adopted person in a non-adopted world! I also want to give adoptees more of a voice and challenge the dominant social narrative around adoption. 

Recommended: Listen to Claire’s interview on AdopteesOn.

And check out Claire’s most popular blog posts:

Gilli Bruce, North of England

Hi, I’m Gilli and I’ve been the Northern end of How to be Adopted for a couple of years now.

I was adopted in 1962 at 8 weeks old. My journey to overcome the impacts of adoption has been life-long. There’s been lots of reading, many workshops, therapy, retreats, training courses and spiritual practice that have all helped to varying degrees, but it wasn’t until I finally faced the subject of the adoption monster that any progress was made. There remains a nervous system set on high alert, much regret, missed opportunities and arrival at a place when I could even think of having my own family – far too late.

Having worked as a training consultant in personal development and working as a coach, I am finally doing what I always wanted to - and Psychotherapy will be my work until I retire now. This background has enabled me to support adoptees and it feels wonderful to be running adoptee meetings and events and working for a brighter future for the next generation.

Read Gilli’s blog posts:

Lara Leon

Hi, I’m Lara and I live on the south coast of England with my partner and teenage son. I was adopted by the process of private adoption in 1970. I was 9 days old when I was passed from my biological mother to new parents. At the time, the ‘blank slate’ theory prevailed; specifically the belief was that at that age, I did not have any pre-adoption experiences - I was a ‘vanilla baby’, upon which my new family could imprint themselves without any problem or difficulty. Unsurprisingly, this was not to be.

Because on some level, I was already aware that I was in unfamiliar surroundings. I was an ‘internaliser’ as a young child. Perfectly behaved, quiet and compliant. We now accept that I was exhibiting a classic response to adjusting to the trauma of separation from my biological mother and adaptation to this environment. My parents had no idea about any of this and continued to parent me as if I were theirs, effectively failing to factor my adoptive status into their parenting. Over the years, my struggles were misunderstood and invalidated which resulted in further difficulty and anguish.

All of this led me to later researching well-being in adults who were adopted as babies or infants as part of my MSc. The findings were unsurprising but do offer a ray of hope for the psychological adjustment of future adoptees. As adoptees we should not have to fight for this to be recognised. But fight we do and we will continue to do so, because the social narrative needs to change.

Read Lara’s blog post I Am Your Daughter

Visit Lara Leon’s YouTube