Adoptee retreat spring 2024
Gilli Bruce and Lara Leon report from their second UK retreat for adoptees….
In May 2024 a group of 21 adult adoptees gathered in North Wales for a weekend of input on adoption topics and group sharing.
We were welcomed by the wonderful people at Noddfa (meaning spiritual retreat in Welsh) in North Wales, who host events, retreats, or just plain old B&B in a lovely old mansion house. There was nice home-cooked food in a cosy and homely environment.
The building
Participants came from far and wide – Scotland, The Isle of Wight, North and South – one participant came from Oregon USA! Even though some had long journeys people felt it was worth the trip – the simple fact of being in a room filled with adoptees was all a bit magic in itself.
The event was organised and run by Adoptees in Alliance: Lara Leon and Gilli Bruce – both adoptees and qualified counsellors, assisted by Roz Munroe – adoptee and knowledgeable coach.
The team hold a wealth of experience and understanding of all things adoption and covered a range of adoption topics including:
Inner Child work
Relationships with the adopted family
Reunion
Relationships with other adults as an adoptee
Boundaries
Calming the Nervous System
With sessions for group sharing on their own adoption experience and how, with reference to the subjects covered - how being adopted had impacted upon people’s lives.
The weekend was rich and rewarding and the group enjoyed some free time to explore locally – some ventured into Conwy, some relaxed in the lovely garden and some brave souls went swimming in the sea!
For some this was their first adoptee weekend, whilst others were returners from the ’23 retreat in The Lake District. We really see the benefits of gathering together as adopted people, so whether that is in-person or on-line it feels very beneficial to connect with other adoptees.
There is a significant demand for adoptee gatherings so we will endeavour to offer what we can, watch this space!
Go gently out there fellow adoptees and look after yourselves.
Gilli Bruce x
Read about the first retreat for adoptees run by Gilli and Leon.
The garden
Read more at Lara Leon’s website
Share below if you know of any other events or retreats for adopted people!
A life-changing day for adoptees to gather in community
Testimonials on our first adoptee-only virtual retreat for National Adoption Week
Anne Heffron with HTBA founder Claire
In October 2022, How To Be Adopted hosted a virtual retreat for National Adoption Week 2022 in the UK. The event was attended by 40 adopted people and - thanks to sponsorship from PAC-UK we were able to provide a large percentage of subsidised/free places to adoptees experiencing financial challenges.
You can now donate to get access to the recordings from the day. £5 for one session; £10 for all three sessions.
The agenda included:
Yoga for adoptees with HTBA founder Claire who has recently qualified as a Kundalini Global yoga teacher.
Adoptee guilt with adoptee and therapist Lara Leon
Our narratives with adoptee and counsellor Gilli Bruce
Breakout rooms with other adoptees, facilitated by HTBA team members
Keynote speech from adoptee and author Anne Heffron
The feedback from adopted people was overwhelmingly positive:
“Very good presentations, well thought out. Provided a safe and caring environment.”
“Wonderful community, excellent talks, perfect mix!”
“Very high quality presentations and well taught yoga tailored towards adoptees and helpful info on yoga for emotional/nervous system regulation. Lara's presentation articulated deep thoughts and feelings I had inside but had not been able to articulate fully before - very illuminating. And I have read and consumed a lot of adoptee material over the last decade - all the key texts and probably every episode of adopteesOn podcast for a start! But she still gave me some new things to think about. I felt deeply understood. Gillian's pres. was very inspiring and I felt quite excited by the possibilities she opened up around stories and trauma. Anne's talk was also fascinating, she went very deep too, it was so refreshing and I love how she didn't hold back and talked about some unusual subjects that actually are right where I am at as well - made me feel validated too.”
“It was a very good balance and mix of speakers and activities (and well-paced).”
“Good to be with others with similar life experiences and hear from interesting speakers.”
“I found it a supportive event really well organised and each session was wonderful. It’s hard to choose a favourite.”
“It was life changing to be with people who totally understand how I as an adoptee see the world and how my head works!”
“It was a fabulous day, such a sense of community.”
“Such rich presentations but it was such a relaxed vibe that although some of the subject matter hit home I never felt unsafe. You all held the group extremely well.”
“Felt I was on the same page as everyone else.”
“Hearing from others who have the same feelings and struggles as I do was incredibly validating. I didn't realize how much it would help!”
“It was a very interesting day and helped me to feel validated and seen.”
“Love your aim improve access to support groups nationally.”
“Gaining understanding, recognition and validation of so many emotional issues that I have struggled with for life and that I have been dealing with and working through in recent years. Also the effects and affects of all these issues in all areas of my life. Also being in the company of other adult adoptee's was so very very reassuring and a rare feeling of true connection was wonderful.”
“I felt the day was very informative, validating, personal and well considered. I appreciate all of your hard work to make the day possible. Beginning the day with Claire and yoga was a terrific way to approach an emotionally and mentally charged day. I also appreciate that each person who spoke is an adoptee who shared their personal experience as well as their research.”
“It was the first time I had ever been amongst other adopted people. I found it very affirming. There was some excellent information and sessions. And others, who seemed further ahead on their journeys, were very encouraging.”
“It was good to hear about some aspects I had not heard about before. - e.g re-writing a narrative to something more helpful, Gillian’s session.”
“Very good day. Good to have a day for adopted adults.”
“I look forward to meeting people in real life!”
Find out more about our 2023 in-person Lake District retreat
The tech support on the day was provided by the excellent Sara Smith of StormVixen.
Lara Leon talking about adoptee guilt