Sophie Willan: highbrow comedy from a care leaver
I booked tickets to Sophie Willian’s show Branded back in January. By the time the show came around in June, I’d forgotten exactly how I found out about Sophie and what drew me to her show. So imagine the jolt of recognition I felt when Sophie Willan uttered the words: “So my mum is a heroin addict,” partway through her set. I realised that until then I’d never heard anyone talk so openly about heroin addiction. As the relative of an addict, there was great power in hearing those words said aloud without any accompanying negativity or Trainspotting references.
What stuck with me was that Sophie spoke about her mum to a room of strangers without a sliver of shame. She was matter-of-fact, accepting and compassionate, as if it were part of who her mum is/was, not everything about her. I realised I've missed hearing people in the mainstream talk about addiction in this way, as well talking about its links to poverty and its effects on future generations. I think it’s only Russell Brand I’ve heard talk compassionately about drug addiction outside of our bubble on Twitter and wonderful organisations such as The Open Nest, etc. (And I’ve talked at length about how great my husband has been at supporting an adoptee.)
I also realised a huge part of what’s missing for me: humour. Generally I'm terrified to tell anyone about my family member and her addiction, and I don’t talk to anyone in my adoptive family about it in depth except my brother, with whom I admit to having some gallows humour moments. Now here was a child of an addict, who herself had been in care, including kinship care, making jokes about her mum in a loving way, i.e. “Let’s just say being a mum wasn’t her skill set.” There can be a feeling of embarrassment and shame in ‘polite society’ from being related to an addict, and it was amazing to feel light and laugh for once at the sheer stupidity of it all. I threw my head back and roared at the utter hopelessness of the situation.
I told Sophie afterwards that I found her show refreshing. I didn’t mean this in a patronising Radio 4 way, as in ‘it’s nice to hear about and then go back to my fluffy world’. I meant it's refreshing to hear someone talk about addiction and poverty and being care experienced without shame, apologies or over-explaining. The facts of her care journey were almost incidental to her stories and observations rather than the purpose of the show.
Sophie’s show is called Branded, which refers to the lazy labels Sophie has been given over the years, from 'working class' to 'Northern', 'woman' to 'care leaver' and more. And the part that stayed with me was her segment about labels. She said when people hear a bit of your story they instantly want to give you one of three labels: victim, hero or devil. I feel this is accurate for adoptees as well.
Sophie Willan ended her show by saying she will not be defined by the labels others insist on giving her. Since finding her online I see she does a lot for/with people who are care experienced, so I hope that’s one label she won’t mind me using when I recommend you check her out - as well as her book Stories of Care.
If you like Sophie Willan, you may enjoy her friend Twanya Mayne’s podcast Loco Parentis in which she interviews care experienced people and professionals.
